M.I.A.
I’ve been missing around the blogosphere. (anxiety)
There’s been a lot that I want to share from my earlier travels and I’ve thought…maybe I can get to that tomorrow…and then I don’t.
So today is a check-in of sorts. I’ll probably add some photos from my archives because I can’t imagine one of my posts without photos. However, I still haven’t imported the photos from my three weeks in Florida. That should be a pretty good indication of how chaotic my life feels at the present moment.
There have been moments when I’ve thought that I should take an extended hiatus from the blog or perhaps walk away altogether, but this space is where I have grown as a person and where I have met so many fascinating people, and I don’t want to walk away from all of that.
I’ve been very open about the fact that I deal with anxiety. I probably even have tendencies toward depression. But mostly when I experience days after days filled with stressors or I am anticipating the next shoe to drop (because of the past cycle of stressors), my anxiety becomes oppressive. I’m not talking about stressors that are likely to be life-threatening nor are they just the “where are my keys” kind of stressors.
My three week trip to Florida was very much about seeing my family and friends, but it was also a reprieve from daily life. I needed some moments to just breathe. My support network in Virginia is not very strong. I suspect much of that is my own doing since I am pretty introverted. I am also the type of person who will call someone up and say “Hey, you wanna go out for coffee or lunch?” not “Hey, I’m really going through some sh*% and could use an ear.”
It was a much-needed break.
So where have I been since returning?
Well, I’ve had a sick teen that I’ve been tending. And when I haven’t been physically tending to them, I’ve been mentally tending to them.
Because…
Anxiety.
Add in that we have a gutted bathroom.
Then add in that Big Mister is replacing our rotted fence and sometimes it requires a second set of hands…mine…
Then add in that school start in two weeks and clothes must be bought. Supplies as well. Food planning must happen. Days must be organized.
And.
More.
Anxiety.
I should mention that I do use meditation, breathing, exercise, time in nature, and the diffusing of essential oils to help manage my anxiety. Many times they keep my anxiety at bay. I haven’t been as consistent with any of them because I’ve been consumed with other things.
I will be back on the blog to make the announcement for the final 30-day challenge in my year of “this is 40” challenges. Can you believe that it’s already been almost a year?
At the end of this week, I am traveling down to Florida with Big Mr. and his friend. Big Mr. plans to meet up with all of his local friends so I will be on my own quite often. I don’t mind. I plan to soak up some sunshine alongside the ocean. Even though I’ve also been less frequent on my Instagram stories, they are a quick way for me to pop in and say hello or share a view so make sure to check those out over this weekend and next week.
As school starts, I will be able to get back to my routines. Hopefully, life will settle down somewhat and I will be able to share stories from my travels and what I’ve been up to lately.
There have been some changes. That’s not always a bad thing.
Some I’ll be able to share and some I won’t.
In some stories, I play the leading role. They are mine to share.
In others, the stories do not belong to me and so while you may get to read some chapters, some of the parts that went into writing those chapters will be private.
Thank you so much for coming along on my journey.
This life is filled with many ups and downs.
My hope is to grow through them all.
Let your light shine!
Amy
